I have to say, I had, at a young age, reached this attitude. I expected nothing good to ever happen, distrusted all things that had the appearance of optimism. Many of you know this already.
But God has said no.
He has spoken that He did not create me to be that way. And He is taking me back.
Over the past few months, He has been actively softening my heart. Showing me good in others, showing me how He views them, how He has made them. More than anything, He has shown me how good He is. I cannot look at Him and say that there is nothing good. He is all the good. I can't look at His face and say that there is nothing beautiful. He is beauty. I can't look into His heart and keep mine hard and unforgiving, when His is full of mercy and grace, despite all offenses.
In all of His faithfulness to show me this, He has asked me for more. He has asked me to stretch out my heart, with all it's scars and callouses, and hand it to Him. He asks me trust Him even more, with my whole heart, of all things. To let Him have it, and say where it will go and how it will love. He is asking me to let Him make my heart His heart.
And I am.
Not because of my righteousness, but because He has proven and continues to prove Himself worthy of holding it. Only He truly knows what to do with it.
And so it is His. As it always was.
I will take you from the nations and gather you from all the countries and bring you into your own land. I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you shall be clean from all your uncleannesses, and from all your idols I will cleanse you. And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes and be careful to obey my rules.
Ezekiel 36:24-27
