Not a whole lot has changed since the beginning of the year. My life is pretty much the same. Actually, I can't think of one thing that is different.
Except that I prayed for joy. And He is granting it.
He is teaching me that joy in circumstances is not true joy. True joy, the kind that is rooted deeply in your soul, is unshakeable, I think. It doesn't fluctuate with the day - whether I work or not, whether I feel skinny or not, whether I think that guy may be interested or not, whether I feel loved by others or not...none of that changes my true joy. My happiness maybe...joy...not really.
If my joy is rooted in God, not just the pat answer of "God loves me, so I'm happy," but my joy is rooted in who God is, what He has done for me, what my identity is in Him, what He has planned for me...it is solid. It is planted deep in my soul. And it cannot be moved.
John Piper, an amazing speaker and author puts a lot of emphasis on joy. I guess I sort of understood what he was saying before. It sounded good, anyway, if not completely unrealistic and pretty impractical. But now, what richness of understanding of the gospel are found in what he emphasizes:
"The really wonderful moments of joy in this world are not the moments of self-satisfaction, but self-forgetfulness. Standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon and contemplating your own greatness is pathological. At such moments we are made for a magnificent joy that comes from outside ourselves.”
So, whether things change dramatically for the good or for the bad, I can still have joy. And, praise God, He is giving it.
Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge. I say to the Lord , "You are my Lord; I have no good apart from you." As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight. The sorrows of those who run after another god shall multiply; their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out or take their names on my lips. The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot. The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance. I bless the Lord who gives me counsel; in the night also my heart instructs me. I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices; my flesh also dwells secure. For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol, or let your holy one see corruption. You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
Psalms 16:1-11
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